The Forgotten Art of Silence

True quietness, in my opinion, is presence rather than the absence. The “thinking power box of the soul” is silence. Through our ears, we absorb the outside environment: our culture.

Modern culture does not place a high importance on silence. It seems that when it comes to communication, we prioritize quantity over quality. And it only gets easier to add your own voice to the drama in our digital age along with our day to day lives. Silence is perceived as a sign of someone being indifferent, hostile, or disagreeing with them. Our age is characterized by noise, not quietness.

Speaking is, of course, at the core of the Christian vocation as well. Many passages in the Bible, including Jeremiah 4:19 and Psalms 32:3, provide us reasons to speak rather than remain silent. Most importantly, we should be thrilled to share the gospel with people.

However, we can’t obey if we don’t remain silent and listen. This is valid on both a material and a spiritual level. Scripture suggests a connection between our thoughts and words. To continue the metaphor, we can only hear, receive, and accept God’s commands when we quiet our hearts.

God’s words and our obedience are woven together by spiritual quietness before Him. Disobedience, on the other hand, is the commotion of internal sin as our heart rejects who we are in Christ. This rule applies generally to all of God’s creation, including angels and devils, not just to His people.

A good person produces good out of the good stored up in his heart. An evil person produces evil out of the evil stored up in his heart, for his mouth speaks from the overflow of the heart.
Luke 6:45 (CSB)

When I’m in my dorm, most mornings I get up, go to the gym, make my protein shake, get my journal, Bible and books and sit in the same chair and desk by my bed in my bedroom. I take my time to settle in and create an environment that is conducive to encountering God. God commends us to spend time with Him, so engaging in quiet times is obeying Him. Being silent and reflecting on the Word helps us self-reflect and grow into our best selves.

But when you pray, go into your private room, shut your door, and pray to your Father who is in secret. And your Father who sees in secret will reward you.
Matthew 6:6 (CSB)

Self-control, another fruit of the Spirit, also shows up when silence and obedience are both present because that’s when we are willing to listen and receive wholeheartedly. Self-control and obedience go hand in hand, yet are separate concepts. When we don’t have the capacity of being silent, that displays our lack of self-control, which blocks the key to faithfulness. The Bible explains that people who don’t regulate their self-control just cause turmoil and they expose their reckless nature.

Idle words are ones that are pointless, devoid of love. Such remarks are frequently spoken. Despite if they may be unintentional, idle words can cause harm to God’s people, pulling them away from forming deep connections, which we as humans need. They don’t provide any consolation or inspiration for the soul. Talks regarding gossip, slander, etc. makes up a disproportionate amount of discussion at school, at home, and roaming the streets. When we utilize meaningless words, we speak too much.

I used to approach self-control in the conventional manner—either you do it or you don’t. I didn’t want to think that sometimes wants and emotions might overpower thoughts, that our priorities in life will always change over time, and that I’m not a psychopath. Although I’m not the talkative type, I’ve spent my life coming up with the finest excuses when it comes to talking inanely with close friends, berating people on social media I didn’t agree with, feeling justified when I passive-aggressively put someone down after something they said or did, or simply speaking negatively about someone in my head. To claim that my primitive self controls my thinking rather than the other way around does not feel the best. But I’ll dare say that some of you can relate.

I’ll also dare to say that some of you are way better in that regard. As long as your thinking is sound, I continue to believe you can solve any problem. With my attempt, I’ve come a long way, but I still have a long way to go. The analogy that most suits is that self-control is like a muscle; you start out with a certain amount of strength that you may gradually increase with practice. And when we start regulating our tongues, we can regulate other areas in our life easier.

The words from the mouth of a wise person are gracious, but the lips of a fool consume him. The beginning of the words from his mouth is folly, but the end of his speaking is evil madness; yet the fool multiplies words. No one knows what will happen, and who can tell anyone what will happen after him?
Ecclesiastes 10:12-14 (CSB)

However, remaining silent reveals our readiness to patiently and kindly help others. In the midst of anger, silence also serves as a stimulus for godly self-reflection, and looking at your heart behind why we’re saying certain things, or want to say something. It demonstrates our willingness to face challenges while keeping a solid grip on the Lord. Additionally, silence controls our capacity to attentively consider spiritual guidance and navigate the world without giving in to its temptations.

Stop fighting, and know that I am God, exalted among the nations, exalted on the earth.
Psalm 46:10 (CSB)

Going back to the discussion on quiet time, it is not only possible to worship God in silence, but Scripture contains one of the most beautiful paradoxes: silence can speak loudly about God’s glory. When we are in awe of God, we honor him. Being told to love Jesus because He loves us may come more naturally to some individuals. But people like I was needed to first understand why they should love and follow Jesus.

Additionally, spending time alone with the Bible and really studying it has amazing results since you aren’t distracted by any potential false impressions of some people in the church that can lead some to turn away from Christianity. It’s just you, God, and His miracles. Because we are created in His likeness, our humble silence honors Him while everything is silent. There are several instances of silent awe brought on by wonder before God in the Bible. We fall in love with His truth as a result of our constant pursuit of Him.

There are two effects of this kind of stillness being beneficial to God’s people. On the one hand, when believers in Christ acknowledge their sins committed against a holy God. The only appropriate reaction to God’s holiness and the impending judgment is silence. On the other side, God’s amazing salvation, which was accomplished through the reconciliation work of Jesus Christ and the prophesied liberation of his people, ought to silence us.

Instead, his delight is in the Lord’s instruction, and he meditates on it day and night.
Psalm 1:2 (CSB)

Silence is a beautiful outcome of our rest in God, much like awe in the light of God’s salvation. The fact that knowing God prompts us to “be still.” We won’t feel the need to prove someone wrong, or have the best comeback, nor overthink and regret that we didn’t afterwards. One who is confident in God can say that they know that He will make everything right for them, and they can wait in silence with trust that announces salvation even in the face of uncertainty, hurt, conflict, and suffering. Even the universe is aware of its Creator and rests at His command, as when Jesus calms the storm. Our faith in God and His deliverance is so firm that fear and anger can be put to rest, and our silence can show and promote rest in Him.

I personally tend to avoid conflict as much as possible. I frequently decide to let things go in the hopes that they will resolve themselves because I believe doing so would be more hassle than it would be of worth. My easygoing attitude would sometimes be influenced by foul intentions or internalized passive-aggressiveness, which caused conflicts to build up into larger issues in my heart, and relationships deteriorate from pulling away. Resting in God instead of yourself is best way to both avoid conflict and have peace in your soul at the same time.

Rest in God alone, my soul, for my hope comes from him.
Psalm 62:5 (CSB)

Now let’s get to this last point: wisdom. When we think of wisdom, we frequently think of speaking—typically to offer advice. But wisdom should more so encourage the exact opposite. The conflict between the necessity to be quiet and the urge to offer advice is particularly evident in the book of Job. Little is gained by Job’s friends’ advice and teaching points. Their unintended “advice” that was successful reached its pinnacle in 2:13: “Then they sat on the ground with him seven days and nights, but no one spoke a word to him because they saw that his suffering was very intense.” (Job 2:13).

Proverbs also regularly encourages silence as a sign of wisdom. It can assist in showing respect and understanding while also avoiding offense and conflict. It is needed for wise and solid relationships. Silence is so potent that it may even make those who aren’t truly wise yet appear wise.

Even a fool is considered wise when he keeps silent—discerning, when he seals his lips.
Proverbs 17:28 (CSB)